


Drip Brew

by exceptionallyunfortunate



Category: Folgers "Home for the Holidays" Commercial
Genre: Additional Warnings In Author's Note, Brother/Sister Incest, Coffee Shops, Crack Treated Seriously, Double Entendre, F/M, Flirting, Implied/Referenced Incest, Innuendo, POV Third Person
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-28
Updated: 2020-07-28
Packaged: 2021-03-06 03:35:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,768
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25566775
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/exceptionallyunfortunate/pseuds/exceptionallyunfortunate
Summary: Coffee is an important tradition in their family. And for Brother and Sister especially, coffee is about a special kind of love. When Mom, Dad, and Sister visit Brother on campus for a familial coffee get-together, Brother and Sister have quite a lot to say about it.This was written as a treat fill for the RelationShipping 2020 fanwork exchange. In the immortal request of neosaiyanangel: "Crack it up. Make it ridiculous. I want to laugh!" Get ready forlotsof coffee-based innuendo.
Relationships: Brother/Sister (Folgers Commercial)
Comments: 9
Kudos: 28
Collections: RelationShipping 2020





	Drip Brew

**Author's Note:**

  * For [neosaiyanangel](https://archiveofourown.org/users/neosaiyanangel/gifts).



> Sister is ambiguously aged but implied to be younger than college age so if you're really hardcore about the 18 line then _maybe_ there's underage. It's just a silly fic, though. About incest. And coffee.

Coffee was an important tradition in their family. It all began when Mom and Dad met in a little coffee house and bonded well into the night over steaming mugs of Folger’s coffee. Ever since then, coffee had meant something special to them. They continued to date, always meeting for coffee, bonding over the nuance of tastes and smells. Mom gave Dad a hand painted coffee mug, then Dad gave Mom a basket of exotic blends. Back and forth went the exchange of coffee-themed gifts to mark special occasions. And when Dad finally proposed, it was with a ring hidden inside an ordinary tub of ground Folger’s. That’s what had sealed the deal and led to the creation of their family.

Brother grew up with a deep respect for the importance of coffee. Sister did too, once she was born. Mom and Dad continued to give each other coffee gifts, and they brought their children into the tradition too, with Folger’s branded clothing, coffee-infused chocolates, and Christmas cards with artful coffee rings on them. Coffee was simply how their family expressed their love for one another.

For Brother and Sister, the coffee tradition was their own special language. Instead of tea parties, Brother sat in on baby Sister’s “coffee parties.” When she cried over skinned knees and scary movies, he made her calming smelling salts out of ground coffee beans. On cold winter nights, they would huddle together under piles of blankets, sipping mugs of decaf cocoa joes for warmth. And when Brother entered high school and would pull all-nighters studying for big exams, Sister brought mugs of freshly brewed coffee to his room and helped him stay awake.

They stayed close, even when Brother left for a college two hours away. On the weekends, Sister would ride a bus to campus and Brother would take her to one of the local coffee shops. And then they would bring their paper cups back to his dorm so they could spend time together as brother and sister, basking in the earthy aroma of warm coffee and each other.

Every once in a while, Mom and Dad would also make the drive to see their son, and the four of them would get together at a café to reunite as a family over bakery treats and fresh coffee.

* * *

They met at the hipster coffee joint—the one that served vegan deserts and gave discounts to customers who brought their own reusable mugs in with them. Mom, Dad, and Sister were prepared, each clutching their cup of choice. They spotted Brother immediately, leaning against the side of the building, grinning. Sister broke into a sprint, closing the half block of distance between them and leaping into his waiting arms for a big hug. “Brother!” she squealed, as if she hadn’t just been by to see him the week before.

Mom and Dad caught up and greeted their son with their own fond hugs. “Oh, I’m so glad to see you,” gushed Mom, while Dad gave a rowdy “how ya doin’, champ?”

Once their pleasantries had been exchanged, they stepped inside and found a little table to sit around. They set their reusable containers down and stripped out of their jackets, draping them over the backs of their chairs before taking their seats. Brother stared at Sister’s mug—one with tiny Santas and colorful cookies printed on it. “I’ve missed that cute mug,” he said, glancing up to give her a meaningful wink. She flashed him a shy bat of her eyelashes, understanding.

Mom pointed to her own mug—one with a prancing reindeer on the side. “Oh, I brought the matching one,” she offered conversationally. “They’re from the Christmas set that Grandma gave us, you remember. Did you want them? We could leave them for you to keep in your dorm.”

Brother put on a thoughtful expression, tapping his chin as stared at the one in front of Sister. “Hmm,” he mused, “I do like those cups a lot.”

Sister bit back a grin and sat up a little straighter. “That tumbler of your is plenty big,” she commented nonchalantly, gesturing at his insulated travel mug. “You probably don’t need any more cups.”

“Yeah, but I fill this one up pretty often though,” he shrugged, licking his lips. “I get thirsty.”

Sister used one finger to circle the rim of her mug. “Well I guess if you want it… you should take it.” She gazed up at him through her lashes.

Brother flashed a charming smile. “Maybe I will.”

While the two of them bantered, Dad picked up a beverage menu. “Okay everybody,” he interjected cheerily, “what kind of coffee do we want?”

Mom leaned towards him to look, as well. As she scanned the page, her whole face lit up. “Ooh!” she cooed, “there have so many _exotic_ blends! That’s quite a lot of countries there. Look, Colombia, Turkey, Brazil...”

Sister twirled a strand of her hair and picked up a menu of her own. “I got a Brazilian a few days ago,” she commented casually. Her eyes skimmed down the page, dropping all the way to her lap, then shot back up to meet Brother’s gaze. He raised one eyebrow, his eyes also darting down for a split second. “From a little place on Main Street,” she continued. “I think it came out nice.”

He scooted closer to her to share her menu while Dad hummed his agreement about Brazilian coffee. Brother’s thigh pressed against Sister’s and their shoulders bumped ever so slightly.

“Have you been to _this_ shop yet, Sister?” asked Mom, still eyeing the page. “What do you think of this one?” She pointed at a special dark roast blend halfway down the list.

Sister read its name and nodded. “We’ve come here a few times,” she affirmed. Under the table, Brother squeezed her thigh approvingly. “That brew’s really good. It has a nice, _strong_ body to it. Very robust.” Her own hand mirrored his, squeezing his leg through his jeans.

“Oh yeah,” Brother agreed, gently stroking. “All the house blends are great. They’re awesome at grinding the beans here.” His fingers inched towards Sister’s fly. “The coffee really perks me up.”

Mom seemed content with their praise. “Excellent, I’ll get it then,” she decided.

“And I’ll be getting the French press latte,” added Dad. “How about you kids?”

Sister was already squirming in her seat. Her eyes were dark as she turned towards Brother. “What do you think about a little espresso?” she asked coyly.

He licked his lips. “Fair trade,” he agreed.

And with that, Dad scooped up their mugs and headed to the counter to place their orders, leaving Mom, Sister, and Brother at the table. Brother cleared his throat. “I think I’m going to go to the bathroom before our coffee arrives,” he announced, rising to his feet with one hand casually hanging off a belt loop.

“That’s a good idea,” Sister said, already rising with him. “I’m gonna go too.”

Mom hummed her assent and waved a hand at them. “Go on, I’ll watch the table.”

The two hurried off toward the back of the café.

* * *

A tray of creamers, sweeteners, and almond biscotti sat in the center of the table when they returned, along with four steaming mugs of coffee. Mom blew on hers and Dad greeted them brightly. “Hey! Just in time, the drinks are still nice and hot.”

They took their seats and Brother flashed Sister a cheeky smile. “Hot is right,” he mused, drawing his tumbler closer to him.

Sister picked up her own mug and took a tentative sip out of it. “This is pretty bitter,” she commented sweetly. “And way too nutty. I don’t know if I can swallow this.”

Dad pushed the tray of fixings towards her. “It’s espresso, Sister, it’s gonna be bitter.”

Brother held one of the little pitchers out to her. “Sounds like you need a lot of cream in there.”

Sister accepted his offer and poured a generous splash of white liquid into her mug. “Or it just needs a slower pull next time,” she countered. Her drink settled into a pleasant caramel color and she handed the pitcher back to Brother so he could do the same with his.

But he shook his head and reached for a sugar packet instead, giving it a firm flick before tearing it open. “I like mine sweet,” he smiled, blending it in with a wooden coffee stirrer. “It brings out the natural taste, you know?” His knee nudged against Sister’s under the table. She picked up a biscotti and dipped it in her mug, nudging him back with a coy pucker of her lips.

* * *

Barista had smiled warmly at the family when they had walked in. Brother and Sister came by every so often and always seemed so adorably infatuated with one another. They often flirted over their coffee and it was nice, even if it did sometimes get pretty steamy.

But that day… Brother sure did look like the spitting image of the older man they were with. And his eyes were just like the woman’s. And… Sister had the man’s nose and the woman’s jawline. And actually, Brother had that same jawline too!

The blood rushed out of Barista’s face. Surely… it couldn’t be…

At their table, the young couple seemed to be flirting the same as always, even groping each other under the table. And the adults definitely didn’t seem to mind or act like anything unusual was happening. Barista could hear their conversation loud as day: “the coffee really perks me up.” And yet… the four of them seemed to be getting along… rather a _lot_ like a family.

By the time Dad approached the counter and the two kids ran off, it felt like a stone had formed in Barista’s stomach. It was far too difficult to look the man—the one who appeared so _distinctly_ similar to those two regulars—in the eye. Hoping for a casual tone, Barista asked, “is that your family with you?”

Dad gave a warm smile and pulled out his wallet. “It sure is! My beautiful wife and our two kids. And we’ll have one French press latte, one special blend #5, and two espressos.” He pointed at each mug in turn to indicate their respective drinks.

Barista rang up the order in mortified silence and, when the two siblings returned together looking rather flushed and pleased with themselves, suddenly understood quite well how a coffee bean might feel about being cracked open, ground to bits, and pressed into hot caffeine juice.

**Author's Note:**

> (I know you wouldn’t put espresso in a mug like that, just roll with it.)
> 
> I had a lot of fun coming up with double entendres for this fic. What can I say, they just _came_ to me! Really just _poured_ out of me! Yay, puns!
> 
> Anyways, thanks for reading!


End file.
